I don't often talk about my "romantic sensibilities", for various reasons. I used to be a heart and thoughts on my sleeve kinda girl. I still am to a degree, but I have grown more guarded in the past 7 years or so, so I generally keep these thoughts to myself, but I've been listening to so much great music lately, most of it in a romantic vein, so I thought I would share my thoughts. :-)
Once, I was asking a friend for advice. I tend to go betweeen the two extremes: either I am in the "depths of despair" (as Anne Shirley so aptly put it) or in the "halls of highest human happiness" (as Peter Marshall put it in one of his sermons on marriage). Romantic feelings tend to be like a roller coaster: sometimes you are just climbing up the hill to where you are so happy and excited!!! (I have to tell you, that there is very little to compare with that high. It can carry you SO FAR!!! :-D) And then, you start to go down, down, down . . . and as you go, you gain more momentum cause those negative thoughts have that kinda power, when you choose to give it to them.
So, I was confiding in a friend (you know who you are! ;-) you're the best btw!) and I was feeling VERY low (you know, it was the story we've all heard and experienced before, when you love/like someone but you have NO idea if they feel the same and you are too scared to tell them for whatever reason. I didn't used to be that way, but as I said before, I am a lot more guarded than I used to be which can be good/ healthy and difficult at the same time;-) ). So, I was trying to get some perspective and perhaps a bit of a reality check. They told me something that I really and stupidly had NOT thought about: that liking someone is a beautiful thing, and that they envied me. Wow! What gifts friends are! :-D As depressed as I was feeling, as hopeless as I was feeling, this completely turned my feelings around! I mean I still felt uncertain and afraid, and VERY insecure, but remembering what beauty these feelings bring into our lives is truly a blessing in disguise, regardless of the outcome.
For example: When you see a beautiful sunset or sunrise, and the first thing you think about is that person. You start to see them in all the beauty around you, in all the songs you hear, all the things you do . . . . this can be both wonderful and a wee bit frustrating too. ;-) But still, focusing on the positive (which can be hard) is the only way to properly channel these feelings so that they are most productive and not self-destructive. Afterall, God allows everything in our lives for a reason, and, as the lyrics near the end of the WONDERFUL musical "Les Miserables" say: "To love another person is to see the face of God."
So, it can be difficult to avoid songs that aren't romantic in some way. Love is everywhere! I was actually granted a little gift a few years ago at a retreat where a priest was comparing the love Christ has for us like the romantic love we have for someone else. Christ courts us. Wanting all of our love, devotion, and attention, to follow Him, to be with Him forever. I started to listen to certain love songs in a completely different way after that. The greatest "romance" any of us can truly have is with God. :-)
Still though, some of those songs remind us how hard, wonderful, painful, incredible, and unbelievable romance is on earth as well! :-D Loving each other, in any capacity, is how we grow not only closer to each other, but closer to God as well. That is the real, true beauty of it all!!!
So, since it is everywhere, it is hard for us all not to feel some propensity towards love songs, no matter whether they are sad, happy, or even on occasion angry or if they are "geared" towards one gender or the other ;-) . We all experience the feelings that are expressed in these songs: longing, hope, insecurity, sadness, happiness, uncertainty, fear, pain, tears, separation, joy, beauty, etc.
Have you ever had the experience of listening to an album and it just seems like song after song after song is the exact story of your life?! You start to wonder if the artist is in the right line of work. Maybe they should take up something like mindreading for a living instead. ;-P
As I have said before, when talking about musicals, there are times in our lives when words alone are not enough to express what is truly in our hearts, and so we turn to music to help express it. Like the beautiful chants in the Orthodox Church that express our love and devotion to God and His love for us. Words are just never quite enough. This is why we turn on the radio, iPod, or CD player. And even for the same reason that we read: to know we are not alone. Even the artist singing the song has shared these feelings and understands them. To remember that you are not the only one, and that we all share these experiences, helps us to not feel so alone or to feel even more joyful!
As Paul McCartney so aptly put it:
"You'd think that people would have had enought of silly love songs.
But I look around me and I see it isn't so.
Some people wanna fill the world with silly love songs.
And what's wrong with that?
I'd like to know, cause here I go again....."
So, you get the idea. :-D There are COUNTLESS love songs out there, and each one a jewel unto itself.
Now, I actually do classify love songs in several different categories:
#1.) The Ballad
These are the slower paced, emotional, coming from the depths of our soul kinda songs.
Some of my favorites include but are NOT limited to:
"This Never Happend Before" by Paul McCartney
"It Might Be You" by Stephen Bishop
"When You Say Nothing at All" by Alison Kraus
"Realize" by Colbie Caillet
"Come What May" from Moulin Rouge soundtrack
"Unforgettable" by Nat King Cole
"If You're Not the One" by Daniel Bedingfield
They are not known for their upbeat happy sound, but for the tightly gripped melodies and the far reaching emotions of discovering love whether it is the first time or the last. Or both! :-)
#2.) Happy Love Songs ;-)
These are the upbeat songs that explore the pure joy and exhileration that love brings into our lives.
My favs are:
"For the First Time" by Lifehouse
"I Think I'm In Love With You" by Jessica Simpson
"Enchanted" by Taylor Swift
"I Love You" by Avril Lavigne
"Contagious" by Avril Lavigne
"Everything" by Michael Buble
"A Wink and a Smile" by Harry Connick Jr.
"Haven't Met You Yet" by Michael Buble
"The Edge of Glory" by Lady GaGa
"What Makes You Different" by the Backstreet Boys
"Miracles Happen" by Myra
"You Set Me Free" by Michelle Branch
"If Only" by Hanson
#3.) The Music of Pain and Hope
These are the songs you listen to when you are sad, uncertain, insecure, missing someone, or just looking for a little hope, etc. You could put many of these in the same category as the Ballad. They often share the same deeply rooted emotional core, only pointing in a different direction.
Favorites:
"Everybody Hurts" by Avril Lavigne
"No Air" Glee version ;-)
"When You're Gone" by Avril Lavigne
"Wish You Were Here" by Avril Lavigne
"Things I'll Never Say" by Avril Lavigne (this is such a cute song!! ;-)
"Hold On" by B*Witched
"Gotta be Somebody" by Nickelback
"I'd Love You to Want Me" by Declan
"The One That Got Away" by Natasha Bedingfield
"No More Lonely Nights" by Paul McCartney
"Out of Reach" by Gabrielle
"The Waiting" by Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers
"Goodnight My Someone" from "The Music Man"
"Somewhere Out There" by James Ingram and Linda Ronstadt
"My Happy Ending" by Avril Lavigne
"Fall to Pieces" by Avril Lavigne (Yes, I have been listening to her alot lately, especially her new album, "Goodbye Lullaby")
"Tearin' up my heart" by *Nsync
"I Want it That Way" by the Backstreet Boys
#4.) Love Songs that Transcend
So, these are actually my favorites out of all of them really. These are songs that most people might not even neccessarily classify as "love" songs. These songs tend to celebrate friendship more than anything, and when it comes down to it, the best and strongest form of romantic love is built on the foundation of friendship. These are songs about being there for each other come hell or high water.
My all time favs are:
"I'll Stand By You" Glee cast version
"Lean on Me" also the Glee cast version :-)
"True Colors" again the Glee cast version ;-)
"The Call" by Regina Skektor
"No Matter What" by Boyzone
"Strong Enough to Bend" by Tanya Tucker
"With You ALL the Way" by Shane Sutton and the soundtrack to the 1990 cartoon film "The Jetsons" I had just thought of this movie (I was 8) and I remember watching this film, especially this song over the credits, the night before we moved from Alburqurque when I was 10 and missing all of the friends I was leaving behind.
"MMMbop" by Hanson (Yes, I put this terrific upbeat song in this category! ;-)
And the ABSOLUTE #1 best song that goes in this category is:
"Keep Holding On" by Avril Lavigne
So, in conclusion, as I was writing this today, I found out that two of my friends are now engaged! Congratulations again Sarah Schlichting and John Hesse! And as I was looking up something about the Orthodox Marriage Ceremony I saw that what Wikipedia had to say was really lovely and of course in complete aggreement with what I said earlier. Here is a quote from the begining:
"The Sacrament or, more properly, Sacred Mystery of Marriage does not unite a man and a woman. Rather, it is the Church's recognition of a union that God has already begun to work in their lives. As long as the union remains within the reality of this world, it will be subject to sin, pain, and death. But, through the Sacred Mystery, the union enters at the same time into a new reality: that of God's Kingdom. In Christ, marriage is restored to its initial perfection and in the sacrament, this union is made open to the possibility of what God intended marriage to be from the beginning: an eternal life of joy in union with Him.
"Thus, marriage goes beyond a legal contract. There is no exchange of vows - the two have freely and coequally committed to one another and consented to God's presence in their union. There is no phrase "'til death do us part". If marriage is brought into the Kingdom of God, death, as a separation, is powerless over it. Christ has destroyed death by His Cross and Resurrection; therefore, the union of man and woman in Christ is eternal."
Love is a beautiful thing, even when it brings us heartache and pain.
One last thought: I just finished watching "Sense and Sensibility" (the Emma Thompson version) and near the end Elinor says to Marianne: "Afterall that is bewitching in the idea of one's happiness entirely depending on one person . . . it is not always possible, we must accept."
Of course it is possible. Perhaps not with another person here on earth, but certainly with our Lord, Jesus Christ.
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