This evening I chose to watch the Merchant / Ivory film, “The Remains of the Day” starring Anthony Hopkins and Emma Thompson. I was quite young when this film came out in theatres (about 11 or 12) but it managed even then to make a lasting impression on me. Like my other early favorite film “Now Voyager” starring Bette Davis and Paul Henreid, “Remains” changed the way I thought about relationships and romantic attachments. Some day I will go into more depth about “Now Voyager” which my father wrote a review of in “Orthodox America” , but right now , I would like to focus solely on “Remains”.
I did not understand at that young age about the politics in the film. Indeed, I am not sure what I knew at all about WWII and Nazi Germany, but that did not mean that I couldn’t enjoy the film for it’s other aspects, which, indeed are the primary focus of the film, the politics playing a smaller role in the background. Having a better understanding of the politics of the time has helped me, as an adult to appreciate the subtleness of the use of it in this story of unrequited love.
However, it is the initial impression this film made on me that I wish to speak of tonight. Again, with the exception of “Voyager”, “The Remains of the Day” was the film that has had the most lasting influence on my life. Being an impressionable 11 year old, I saw the film and immediately felt deeply the sadness of the relationship upon which the plot centers. The fact that neither of the two protagonists (or antagonists perhaps since they each spend much of their time antagonizing each other ;-) ever openly express their feelings for each other was something that my 12 year old heart felt was just plain pathetic. Yep, that was the exact word I remember saying to myself over and over (I think that was my favorite word at the time as well ;-). Mostly, I was struck at how unhappy each person was with their decisions or lack thereof. I knew right then and there, that would NEVER happen to me. I was determined never to let an opportunity for love to pass me by. Frankly, people, and we all know this to be absolutely true…… life is just too short.
It was not long after seeing this film again on video that my first crush began. He was older than I was, and his family had only recently been chrismated at my church. I also happened to attend the same private school. This of course, being my first big crush, I decided to write him a love letter. I left it where I was pretty sure he would find it at church, and, get this…I spelled his name wrong! I know, I know, it was terribly embarrassing, and I cannot begin to describe the redness of cheeks that ensued in the following year, but suffice it to say that I did not remain in private school much longer and was home-schooled beginning at the age of 13.
Now, the question is: Have I ever regretted being this way? Always open about my feelings, and not hiding them? Having made the very deliberate choice, being strongly persuaded by this film written by and Japanese man who grew up in England? Absolutely not. I have been embarrassed, I have been rejected every single time, but God has just not seen fit to put the right person into my life as yet.
Ultimately everything is in God’s hands, but as my dad delights in reminding me: “The Lord helps those who help themselves.
So, in conclusion, I highly recommend this film for which both the leads received academy award nominations and very deservedly so. It is an elegant story about the life of servants in an English country house before the devastation of WWII. Even though there is no happy ending, the story stands the test of time for that very reason.
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